Day 217

I cant believe its been over 200 days since my kids have seen their father....When I think about it, it makes me sad. But just at first because when I see the number 217 it makes me think Wow it cant be that much longer can it! That makes me more excited and glad were nearly there.
 Soon We will be putting this long absence far behind us and we will be neck deep in the regular chaos and enjoyment of our family together as we go about each day. 
 Its almost scary because it seems like Ive done NOTHING while hes been gone. I have a sense other army wives Im sure are no stranger to, where I feel like I have this sudden need to rush and finish up some large imaginary to do list. The one I made up in my mind full with all the things I would and could get to do while he was away.  But Ive really just laced up my boots and been running ever since. In and Out everyday completely filled with feeding babies, chores with kids, cleaning house, grocery shopping, family time, school events, sports games and practices, etc. It really has not gone by slow at all and I give God the Glory for that!
 Probably only 1 to 2 times and they've been very recently like since weve hit the 200 day mark...have I had a moment in between manic momma and bedtime beauty have I actually had enough time where I was actually alone long enough and with so little to do that I actually had time to feel that ucky feeling of being lonely creep up on me.  Im not nor have I ever been a woman who is the lonely type. It even kinda caught me off guard the other night I was like whoa wheres this coming from? But I know its just from the ever present always everyday underlying me missing him. First I thought Oh I need to get up and get on another task and maybe get some more work done...but I stopped and realized no. No, its ok, its alright and probably even healthy to let myself even if for just a little bit sit in that feeling of how much I really do Miss him. How much I cant wait for him to be home again. I don't usually have time to even take it in but I did give myself that time that night. And you know what, it was fine I didn't cry, I wasn't angry I just reflected on him, and me and just being US.
 We got a gift in the other day from him and it was a great family time for us. Now the kids get to see their dad and while its not in person It was just so emotional for them to see him through the tv screen that night, My oldest cried and cried and the next in line was talking to him like he could hear it was just so cute! I was also amazed to see that even the babies recognized him and his voice as he read them a great story before bedtime :) I am very glad for that connection as a daily reading time with daddy now even while hes away.  For now were all still growing physically, mentally and spiritually and will continue to do so as we face the next 100 days to come! HooRah! Never been so proud to be a Army Wife.